VOICE MAIL

[inspirethefire]

"This is Hajime Tanaka. I'm sorry to have missed you. Leave a message. Call for me if necessary!"

((Voice mail or texts. His phone is deliberately cheap and low-tech; he doesn't do e-mail, and generally prefers face-to-face whenever possible.))

Comments

[inspirethefire]

Mm. Yes, I wanted to help people. To help them be the very best they could be. Allowing people to see in themselves what I saw. And this was the best method that allowed me to not get to know any of them.

[He keeps just focusing on carving chunks off of his floor.]

I don't have to talk to anyone, or learn anything about them, or even make eye contact. I can't screw up by saying the wrong thing or guessing incorrectly or missing a cue. I just do a routine from a safe distance away, and skip straight past the convoluted rules making up social interaction.

[forgetbeam]

[Now it's his turn for a moment of silence to mull things over. In a way, that duty doesn't sound so different from his past as a prefect - encouraging others to do their best while being detached due to his position. But his own isolation was never so voluntary. His friendships now have given him both the greatest joys and the most crushing heartaches, but he would never go back to how it was before.]

...How could you possibly see the best in people without even knowing them?

[He lowers his gaze a little, considering his words carefully. He's never really been any good at speaking on a personal level.]

I used to think it was fine to be like that. In fact, I was never close to anybody until shortly before coming here. Getting to know other people does mean getting to know their worst as well, but in doing that, you truly find out what obstacles you can help them overcome! And they can do the same for you. That's what I believe in now.

[Reaching on out to put his hand over Hajime's. You put your dumb tools down when he's talking.]

That's what you need, too!

[If there is a bit of a squeeze going on it is only one of ENCOURAGEMENT.]

Do you understand? Help yourself by allowing others to help.

[inspirethefire]

[It hadn't been his intention at the start, not consciously, anyway. But recently, he's been thinking about where he's failed, and why. What he's doing wrong. There's too much to keep straight, it feels.

He sags a little at Ishimaru's touch.]

I'm a joke. I grew afraid of failure, and looked for an easy way to tell people there's no easy way and not to fear failure. As if I have any right.

[He's breathing hard. By this point he must look so pathetic that crying can't make him look any worse, but it still hurts. Physically. Damn ribs.]

If... when I fail again, when I falter, will you make sure I don't run from it again?

[forgetbeam]

Of course! Failures are there to learn from and overcome, and I'll help you every step of the way if you let me!

[As far as he is capable, anyway. There's only so much he can do about people turning into lava beasts.]

No matter what this school throws at us, as long as we work together, it won't break us.

[Even if it drags them down for prolonged periods.]

[inspirethefire]

Right... definitely! Friendship is the single strongest antidote for failure!

[ He swallows hard, sniffs, and finds a smile as he finally makes eye contact with Kiyotaka. ]

I'm so lucky to have as strong a bond with you, to guide me.

[forgetbeam]

[It is so good to see that smile. He returns it and withdraws his hand.]

Ha ha ha! It will go both ways, Ta... no, Hajime. As proof of our bond, I'll address you as such! How does that sound?

[inspirethefire]

[Oh man. Dude he's super gonna cry. He's trying so hard not to but oh man he needed this reel bad.]

I... I can't possibly think of a truer sign of esteem.

[A hoarse little laugh]

Whatever may happen in this school, I'm glad I came, just for the opportunity to know you, Kiyotaka.

[forgetbeam]

[THIS IS SO HEARTWARMING. It worked! His heartfelt speech worked! Not that there are passionate tears at the corners of his eyes or anything.]

All right! The first obstacle we'll overcome together is to get this place tidied up!

[He holds his fist out. You know what to do this time, right Hajime.]

[inspirethefire]

[YES. He has learned it. THE FIST OF BROTHERHOOD. Donk.]

Hah. It'll be better than new in no time!

[No, probably not, but he's going to ride this moment of hope as far as he can.]

[forgetbeam]

[know what else he could ride though]

[forgetbeam]

[But for real they are going to tidy up and have hot lotion rubdowns and it is going to be

SO GREAT

FRIENDSHIP IS GREAT

stay tuned for the next despairing incident here at smash academy]